Mercy, Mercy Me

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Wanna leave Lorne a message?

He just got himself an interdimensional answering machine.

'This is the resident lean, green karaoke machine and counselor extraordinaire. Drop off a request and I'll see what I can do. In other words, this is Lorne, leave your name and number and I'll get back to ya as soon as inhumanly possible. Working nine to five, people, what a way to make a living.

...*beeep*'

Decisions are never easy to make. Well, unless you're talking flossing, or whether or not to have that extra piña colada before calling it a day. If you're talking that kind of decision, you don't know how difficult it can really get.

Like, when you feel like you've stuck in a rut, professionally and creatively, and no matter how much you love it... It isn't quite what you want to spend the rest of your life doing.

Life-changing decisions, now, they can be a bitch and a half, because you never know what will come of them, good or bad. But one thing, you do know, and that's how important it is to talk it over with the people you love.

Or, in Lorne's case, a very special someone.

After the working day is done, Lorne brings two mugs of cocoa to Otto's room, and taps the door with the tip of his fancy, blinged out loafer.

"Toto, darling, you in there?"

Christmas? Christmas sucks. Like a really big vacuum cleaner. And the short few days between that and New Year's? They suck even more.

It's official. Lorne's got the Holiday Blues with a big, fat, capital 'blah'. If he so much as thinks of watching Funny Girl one more time, he'll throw the TV set out the window.

But this is a work day, no matter what anyone tells him. He's in his office, making plans for the business end of the coming year. He's got people to pencil into his schedule, he's got calls to make and various other job-related miscellanea to get going on. There's a cup of steaming hot cocoa in front of him, and he's bundled up just a little bit extra - being Human doesn't only stink in the visual sense, he's freezing his tush off.

Just another day at the counselor's.

I work hard every day of my life
I work till I ache in my bones
At the end of the day
I take home my hard earned pay all on my own
I get down on my knees
And I start to pray
Can anybody find me somebody to love?

( Read more... )

His cheerful gift giving and notes to the contrary, Lorne will be spending the entirety of the Holidays locked up in his room, watching the classics. The Wizard of Oz, Vertigo, Shrek (which is so a classic, just you wait!), Gone with the Wind, oodles of Barbara Streisand movies...

It's a long, long few days, Christmas.

( Headmaster and Headmistress Snape )

( Luke )

( Otto )

( Eiko and Isis )

( Captain Harkness )

( Mister Poirot )

( Mister Boat )

( Madeline )

( Gabriel Grey, and his family )

( Doctor Bashir )

( Njokiloveling )

( Mister Tetu )

( Nurse Branigan )

( Some )

( The Moat Monster, Kraken )

( This may not be suitable for minors. Or for people with no sense of humor. Or for people who can't stand things ending on a low, low note. )

Okay. The resident counselor has been LOLed. Not into the opposite sex (though that might be just as hilarious. You try imagining him WITH A BEARD! I DARE YOU!), not even into anything opposite his usual self.

No, boys and girls, something even more mind boggling has occured. He has been LOLed into a human being.

See Here and here.

So. He's human. With aaaaaall that entails.

Questions? Thoughts? Hit me!

( Looong post )

The evening is cold and dark, as is the wont of this time of Nexus year. Inside his private room, Lorne lounges in his fave armchair with a good book and an even better BGM, his trusted Seabreeze sitting on the table next to an ashtray. Tiny little wisps of smoke reach for the ceiling from the ashtray, where a cigarette balances delicately on the edge.

His door may be closed, but that won't stop him from being a good host. Just give him a try.

Lets101 - Free Online Dating

( Which Sesame Street character are you? )

( THNM November fluff )

Well, dear diary,

It's been a productive few months now, hasn't it? I think I'm finally getting a hang of this gig; it's busy, it's turning me inside out and back again with stress, but it's good for the soul. Keeps my ticker tocking at a somewhat steady pace - and sometimes racing like a greyhound after a fake rabbit, but that's not really due to stress levels. Or maybe it is, just a different kind of stress. If you ever read this, Toto, I am gonna slap you silly, silly.

Jokes aside, a few poignant side dishes from that smorgasbord for thought I keep telling myself to stay away from. Note to self: You never really get that expression, 'food for thought' until you're an empath demon.

- Bring Kurtlet a bunch of comics. You know he'll love you forever in a completely platonic way. He needs some distraction from the boo-boos and owwies, and comics rule omnipotent in that aspect.

- Captain Harkness is back, in one piece, I might add. Word around the water cooler's he's been through Hell and lived to tell the tale. Headmaster Snape asked me to keep an eye out for him, but I think two eyes are better than one.

- Compile USB of Whitney Houston songs for Luke.

- Do the same, but Queen, and albums, for Otto. It's about time he learned you can have rock without the roll.

RotM Prompts 1.81 - 11/1/2007

MUSE PROMPTS:

1. Quotes? We got six of them.

( a. Eternity is a terrible thought. I mean, where's it going to end? Tom Stoppard – Czech Writer )

( MUN PROMPT: MANDATORY FOR ALL MEMBERS! )

Lorne --

[adjective]: Smells like teen spirit

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Word count: 340

MUN PROMPT:

( When your muse really, really wants something, how do they go about getting it? Are they plotters? Are they patient? Or do they throw a fit? Is there something that they want right now, and you can’t understand it? Talk about your muse and how they go about getting what they really want. )

So. Seeing as the resident counselor has found a fellow fan of a variety of alcoholic beverages in the resident Jedi knight, what better way to celebrate this new-found common denominator than to socialize with a few drinks?

As long as neither of them are aiming at getting hammered, or even remotely wasted, what can go wrong?

Two hypotheses, one way of finding out.

Sometimes, it's good to have bartender contacts. Lorne's stocked up for the night, and not all of it's purely for the Human palate. Oh, no, someone's got connections and ain't afraid to use 'm.

So, here's the deal. Lorne's an anagogic demon Eternal Plot Device of Awesome. As such, he's very good at picking things up. Like emotional fluctuations, warranted they're significant enough to go blip on his radar. Safe to say, Njoki has been through some rough times this past week or two, and safe to say, enough's enough. It's time for some R n' R, some Tender, Lovin' Care, counselor style.

That's why, lo and behold, Lorne comes bearing comfort food in the shape of a platter full of chocolate, chocolate chip cupcakes. You know the kind; the kind you tear big chunks out of, the kind that melts in your mouth.

Yes, the Death by Chocolate kind.

Now, all's left is finding out if Ms. Njoki even likes chocolate to begin with. Ahem.

Knock, knock. Lorne's here.